daily-grind [summer schedule]

So I've figured something out.

Delegating housework to the children is a fabulous idea.

And they do a good job!

And that means LESS for ME to do!

And, why didn't I do this a long time ago!

Well, anyhow.

I've also learned that having a planned-out daily schedule makes things so nice.

And there's a lot less standing around!

And they know what's coming next!

And they know when they can kick back and finally watch TV!

So, here's my really simple plan o' the day, written on my kitchen-cabinet chalkboard: 

(Morning activities haven't hit the board yet.  But they will.  Oh, they will.)

This particular day's chores were way easy.

But don't you worry, I kick it into high gear on some days.

Indeed, I do.

But in all seriousness,

I have found that with older adopted kids, they desperately need structure and routine.

It's hard to understand sometimes,

but they are most often completely lost if you give them a full day of free-time.

This plan is helpful to avoid that lost and bewildered behavior.

And Lucy and Isaiah looooove this, too.  

Lucy is a list-person (like her mama) and she eats this stuff up!

So, now I'd like to hear how YOU handle the daily-grind of summer.

Do you have a similar plan as mine?

Do you schedule lots of activities for the kiddos?

Do you hide in your laundry room, nursing an endless cup of coffee?

Do tell what works well for you and yours!

my endorsement [and much more]

All right.

I'm all about keeping the peace here on my little

slice of cyber-utopia.

But I'm going to step out on a limb here a bit.

Though most of you won't be surprised one iota,

I am going to announce my my presidential endorsement:

The editor-in-chief and the staff here at JOY Unspeakable

hereby endorse,

MITT ROMNEY 

for President of the United States of America.

It comes down to this:

ONE of these two men WILL win the election.

We NEED to vote for the one who most closely holds to the values

of the Bible, AND adheres to the Constitution.

Period.

He's a Mormon.  Well, fine.  That doesn't excite me in the least.

But he's running for President, not for pastor of my church.

Obama clearly does not have American values in mind

for the future of our country...so, Romney it is!

If you don't vote, do NOT complain.

EVER.

I don't want to hear it.

It burns my butter-buns when people don't vote.

It's not right.

Not biblical.

Not American.

And that's the truth.

Get out there and VOTE.

******

Completely unrelated, but almost as equally controversial

(might as well get this all over with at once!),

PLEASE go read my friend Patty's latest blog post.

ESPECIALLY if you are an adoptive parent.

ESPECIALLY if you are an adoptive parent of an older child.

That's all the turbulence I have for you for now.

Stay tuned for fluffy and glittery blog posts from here on out. 

(Actually, I totally cannot guarantee that.)

Love Jesus.

Love your family.

Love America.

Blessings, ya'll!

Lori

confusion!

First things first.

We had our one-year post-placement visit tonight.

I can't tell you how desperately I wanted to bail on the whole

dang thing and save ourselves 500 bucks.

But I knew we needed to do the right thing.

To do what we agreed to do.

And I positively adore our social worker.

She was MOST grateful that we followed through.

She knows the whole sha-bang story of what's been going

on with our older kiddos' adoptions.

And she is so supportive and sympathetic and wonderful and on our side.

And wonderful.

She's wonderful.

She is THE best social worker in the world.

I wish I could share her with you.

And I am SO sad that we are at the end of our

adoption-related relationship.

Because we will NOT be adopting again.

We will not.

It didn't really hit me until she left our house

(even though she SAID it as I walked her out to her car),

that she wouldn't be coming back to our house anymore.

Wahhhh!

You are the BEST, Heather W.!!

And just between us friends,

I desperately want to fix her up with my brother-in-law.

Wait.

Who said that?

Never mind.

(For now)

******

In other news:

You guys have me totally confused regarding my hair affair.

Dang it all!

It seems that you are 50/50 on your opinions.

Fickle people!

So I am left to make a decision on my own.

I will let you know what I decide.

Oh, how I will let you know.

With pics.

the dark side of the aging-out program

As a follow-up to the article,

The Dark Side of China's "Aging Out Orphan" Program

by Brian Stuy,

I'd like to give a few points of my own thoughts,

because we are very much in the thick

of this situation.

By the way, I am "Debbie" mentioned in the article.

First, in regards specifically to the Journey of Hope project

that WACAP put together (that BOTH our oldest were included in),

there were red flags from the get-go and

as the article states, a very trusted American working closely

with the children in the orphanage warned WACAP of his concerns

of these children having family members.

And WACAP chose to ignore him.

In fact, he was mysteriously asked to leave the orphanage and not return.

I want to reiterate that point because it is significant.

I'd also like to say that I spoke with WACAP eight+ months

ago about all this,

and all I got was a condescending email touting of how great

Director Pei is and that I was clearly mistaken about

his involvement in corruption.

But we now know so much more.

I truly believe that had it not been for the "gathering of children"

for this project, and empty promises made to Chinese families by Director Pei

and the civil affairs office,

and WACAP's lack of investigation when told about the concerning red flags,

these kids would still be living happily in

their families in their birth country, with birth relatives.

But oh, how money speaks.

And greed spreads like wildfire.

I am angry.

I am angry because not only are we left to deal with the normal

baggage that adoption brings,

but we are dealing with the enormous brokenness that

this situation has put on our children.

I know first hand of one of the Journey of Hope children who wrote a letter

to send to a relative in China.

His American parent had the letter translated.

How interesting that a portion of it it said,

I will send asthma and diabetes medication as soon as possible.

I will return to China.

Please wait for me.

It is chilling that these kids carry that kind of weight.

Shame on all the adults who put that on them.

And I'm tired of all the desperate pleas by agencies

and others for kids to be adopted,

as if America is the answer.

America is NOT the answer.

Christ isn't exclusively in America.

He is the one true God of ALL NATIONS.

Yes, we have a responsibility to care for orphans.

Much of the time, adopting them is exactly

what we are to do.

But perhaps, caring for them isn't at all about playing on the heartstrings

of families to bring them into their homes,

causing all kinds of stress on both the child and family.

Perhaps sometimes we simply pray.

And perhaps what we should do is

stop trying to be the hero.

Perhaps we need to encourage and monetarily support ministries

who are pouring themselves into helping orphans, enabling them

to stay in their home country and live very productive lives.

I know of an orphan who wasn't adopted,

aged-out...and guess what?

A ministry stepped in to help him.

He now has a job, supports himself, and LOVES THE LORD!!

In fact,

he was recently featured on a Chinese television show

because of his inspiring story.

There is a great ministry right in Henan that is doing exactly that.

I do hope that you'll consider reading about and possibly

supporting,

Lighthouse China Foundation.

My friend Tami,

who serves on the board and just returned from China,

had this to say:

my husband and i just got home last night from a week in henan province. we
visited two private orphanages and a larger government orphanage. our
non-profit works in that province and we were going to check things out on the
ground there vs. getting second hand reports.

all the PEAR stuff and brian's report don't surprise me, really. and honestly,
the goal of my post isn't to specifically weigh in on that. i mostly want to
provide a brief report about things that are going RIGHT in china - henan
specifically.

we met an amazing man. he is 72 years old and he and his wife
are running a private orphanage for 20 orphans there. 2 of his kids are in
university, 5 are boarding at high school in the city (his orphanage is on the
outside of the city), 12 are attending local schools and 1 is not allowed to
attend school because of a severe seizure disorder. ALL of the children
(including the one not allowed by the government to attend school) receive
tutoring 4 days a week from students at a local teaching university. he
provides for all their physical needs and is providing training
for their future.

his motivation? he was an orphan and is responding to the needs he sees around him.

we met another man in shenqiu. he lives in an AIDS village. 2,000 residents.
400 people with AIDS. 200 of the people in their village have died in that past
2 years. he is caring for the AIDS orphans in his village. 20 children.
sending them to school and providing for their needs. he saw a need and is responding.

these are two AMAZING examples of people giving and loving - not for selfish
gain, but because they saw a need and responded. you would be so impressed by
the level of care they can provide with NO government funding. they have no
motivation to put on a good show (as so many of us have seen in the government
SWI). i should add that both of these orphanages care for children that are
almost exclusively over 14 years old. none are adoptable, as they are not
registered in a government orphanage.

we visited a government SWI. we went with the only purpose of visiting a
private care facility within the government facility. i had received the full
tour 9 months ago and didn't want to go through that ridiculous song and dance
of "look how much we LOVE orphans and how AWESOME we care for them!". the tour
guide was very disappointed when we refused the tour to only visit the care
facility.

*I am not in any way affiliated with this

ministry. I am simply listing

it here as a great option for anyone

interested in supporting older-child orphan ministries

in China.

********

In closing,

I need to stress to you that I am in no way discouraging adoption,

even that of older kids.

Adoption is at the very heart of God.

But when there are red flags, brace yourself.

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless

is this:

to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to

keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

James 1:27

realities

As you well know,

I'm all about *glitter and rainbows* on my blog.

Fluffy clouds and unicorns.

But I can't keep my silence any longer on a

very real and sobering issue regarding older child adoptions in China.

If you are at all interested,

please go read THIS ARTICLE.

I can fully attest to its truth.

getting real

I feel I owe you all some transparency.

We are struggling a bit.

I know the pics above would appear otherwise.
These three kiddos really do have a blast together.
Our new boys are both really, really good boys.
They are happy, silly, and well-behaved.

The thing is,
older child adoption is hard.

Some of you have emailed/called me asking for advice in
this area...and I'm sure you were shocked to get
my not-so-cheery response.

Having just celebrated our 2 year anniversary with Macy
being with us,
we realize how far she has come...
but we also realize how very far Eli has to go.

And this may sound selfish (and I suppose it is),
but it also reminds us how much of US it requires.

WE are tired.
And it is hard to see how we have it in us to make this
a success story.

It's just hard.

And if you haven't been through it,
I can't even begin to explain it to you.

Nothing alarming has happened.
Everyone is safe.


It's just...hard.

I do ask that you would pray for us.
We need discernment.
We need direction.
We need a new vision.
We need something to change.




Thank you for letting me share with you.
I hope some of it makes sense.

5 = 15 = 50

Lucy's birthday was "fun"....

turns out that,
5 = 15 = 50.

In other words,
she very much acted like a mixture of a pubescent 15 year old
and a menopausal 50 year old.

Roller coaster of emotions.

Oh, it was great fun.

Anyway, I'll try to post pics later but I'm having issues.
(Photo issues, that is)

In the mean time,

swing over HERE to read a great post by a 13 year old
adopted girl from China.

Love it!

would you consider....

I just wanted to pass this info on that I received from our agency:

A 13-year-old boy urgently needs to be adopted before he ages out in January. We are counting on your help to spread the word about the need for homestudy-ready family to adopt this terrific boy ASAP. Please feel free to repost this information!

He is a computer whiz, has a good sense of humor, a repaired cleft lip and a blood disorder, but he has been tested for HIV and is negative. Emergency exceptions can be granted for families interested him, and families can adopt him with another child.

This boy is in Asia and this adoption requires travel. We had a devoted family for him, but due to circumstances beyond their control they could not complete this adoption. We need a homestudy-ready family that has started their immigration work in order to complete this adoption on time.

Ask about Child ID#: LZ-0197-16675-01

When we met with this 13-year-old boy he spoke in a soft voice but clearly stated that his main interest is computers! His favorite subject in school is computers and his favorite out-of-school activity is working on computers. He has a repaired cleft lip and palate but his speech is understandable, though as he counted in English a slight lisp was noticeable. Although he is a bit shy, he did ask if everyone in the room was supposed to be speaking in English! Watching him later in our meetings, it was clear that he has an engaging personality and a good sense of humor, likes to entertain others and is a leader among the other children. He showed a competitive, but very appropriate, spirit in the group games. By breakfast of the second day, he had lost any shyness, not hesitating to approach our staff and asking with a smile the English word for an item he held up—a hardboiled egg. This nice boy is need of a family! He has a blood disorder, but he has been tested for HIV and is negative.

Requirement waivers: Waivers can be requested if you do not meet some of the requirements for adopting from China. If you are married, we can ask for exceptions to the adoption requirements (i.e., if you are over the age limit of 54, somewhat over the BMI limit of 40, somewhat under the income/net worth, or have medical conditions, etc.).

Financial Aid: A family of any income is eligible for grants/waivers ranging up to $9,550 in aid for this particular child. There is a $4,200 Promise Child grant and the $250 WACAP application fee is waived. Please also ask about up to $4,000 in reductions possible on a case-by-case basis and a new private donation for this adoption of $1,000. There is no fee to ask for this child's information file. Please also ask your tax consultant about $13,000-plus Adoption Tax Credit.

Please contact WACAP’s Family Finders department for more information on this child, or any of the many children waiting for families right now. FamilyFinders@wacap.org or . Please reference Child ID#: LZ-0197-16675-01.

older child adoption

A couple months ago when I took Macy to her doctor's appointment, I was standing at the nurses' station as she got dressed in the little exam room. The nurses all raved about how precious she was. Yes she is.

Then one of them innocently said, "Wow, are you guys just having a blast with her? Is she just LOVIN' it here in America??"

Dumbfounded and speechless, I was.

My compassion for this ignorant woman (I say that with all kindness) kicked in as tears filled my eyes as the reality rang loudly in my heart and mind.

I told her bluntly, "NO. She doesn't love it here at all. She misses China deeply."

The nurse suddenly felt a great deal of understanding come over her, or so it seemed. Bless her heart.

The truth is, yeah, America is super great. We have everything here. Everything. But you know what? Even though Macy (and others like her) CHOOSE to be adopted and move here, they are taken from a place that was their HOME. Bad as it might have been, it was all my sweet girl knew. Her friends and caregivers in the orphanage (she never speaks of her life before the orphanage...yet) were her FAMILY.

The food, the smells, the language, etc., etc...are now half a world away. And though she does enjoy many of the perks her new home has brought to her, she still grieves her loss.

But yet...a family is what she wants and it's what she wants for her friends still in China.

Several times she has come to me and said, "Do you know so and so (insert Chinese name)? He/she asked me on QQ (Chinese Facebook) if they have a family coming for them."

You guys, that question haunts me.

Sometimes my answers to her are, yes...they do have a family! But sometimes the answer is, I don't know....or, like it was last night, NO...not that I know of. It was all I could do to not burst into tears and I think she could see that.

I asked her if most of the older kids want to come to America to be adopted. She said that ALL of them do. Oh my heart. So I then had to explain to her why so many families want babies....and why most people are afraid of adopting older children.

Yeah, that was tough, my friends. Telling this sweet, shy, compliant child why so many people are afraid to adopt a child just like her.

I then explained to her that that's why I post things on my blog about her...so that people won't be so afraid.

Yes, it's true. There are horror stories of adoptions gone bad. Believe me, I've heard them, even had a sweet friend experience it. My heart goes out to those who have tried with all their might...only for their adoption to be much harder than they expected, or worse yet, for it to end in disruption. It's sobering. It's not something to enter into lightly.

But look, I've heard from so many of you through emails asking questions...because you feel that perhaps you are being called to adopt an older child. I can't say that your fears will ever go away as you take the leap of faith...but let those fears lead you to the Lord for courage AND let it lead you to educate (beyond what is required) and prepare yourself for such an adventure.

There are a couple of boys and a brother and sister on the WC list from Macy's orphanage (and MANY more from other places). If you want more info, go to WACAP's website. Email them to get the password....then look at the OLDER kids...say, 9-14 years old.

I dare you.

If you should choose to go forward with an older child...yes, they will go through a tough transition...yes, they will GRIEVE, yes, YOU will grieve. Everyone involved experiences loss...the loss of what once was. Your child might even give you a run for your money and you will question why in the world you chose this road (or rather, why God guided you there) and believe me, your child will question it also.

But it will stretch you like you could never imagine. It's terribly painful sometimes...but it's also pure joy, MOST of the time.

I was chatting with one of Macy's new friends (also from China) on Facebook recently. She's been in America for over a year now. I asked her if she misses China...she said, "I used to but not anymore...I really love America so much!"

It just takes time, a ton of love and PATIENCE.

I am amazed to look at how far Macy has come in four months (yes, it's been FOUR months!). She blooms a little bit more each day.

She is a delight.


**Please appreciate the great amount of courage it took for me to post this picture of ME between two teeny tiny Chinese noses! LOL.


********************************************************************
**Please don't think I'm minimizing the need for adopting babies (especially special needs babies)!! Oh, that's so not my point here. They need families desperately! My point is that I know many of you have a curiosity about older child adoption but you are fearful. Don't let fear guide you. There is too much good in it to miss out.

URGENT need for older girls about to age-out

Oh my heart. I got an email from our agency that there are two adorable girls about to age-out. All the info is below. Please note that you must have a dossier already in China with an approved I-600. I can't post their pictures but trust me, they are cute as can be!! **Take notice of what I put in bold in the description of the first girl. Could that be any more heartbreaking? Every child should know the roll of a parent.

From WACAP: URGENT

There are only a few weeks left to find these two girls families before they age out.

Only families with a dossier already logged in with this country and an approved I-600 (not I-800) can adopt either of them. If you know someone in this position who may be interested, please contact us immediately! 206-575-4550

First precious girl....
MUST BE ADOPTED BEFORE February, 2010

**** is in an older old girl in an age appropriate grade in school where her favorite subjects are singing and Chinese. She wants to be a philosopher when she grows up. When asked whether it is best to be a boy or a girl, she said it’s better to be a boy because boys are tough. She says she has many friends. When asked how she reacts when she is mad at someone, she says she ignores them. When asked about parents, she said she knows about mothers and fathers but doesn’t know what they do.

We were advised that she has “fragile bones”; that both her femurs had broken, but in 2005 she had surgery where rods were put into both her legs. Since then she has not had further breaks. Due to this she is extremely short for a 13 year old.

She has a low voice and speaks some English.

There are up to $9000 in grants to help a family who makes less than $125,000/year adopt her.


Second darling girl...
MUST BE ADOPTED BEFORE FEBRUARY, 2010.

**** is a 13 year old young lady who dreams of having a big adoptive family, with lots of brothers and sisters. She admits to being “bossy” with the younger kids in the orphanage but also says that she is proud of herself when the teachers praise her for helping with the younger children. When asked she says she would like to become a policewoman when she grows up. She’s a typical pre teen as she loves to talk and play with her friends, describing herself as outgoing, and not liking to be by herself. Her cleft lip and palate have been repaired and her speech is clear. She has a sweet, slightly shy demeanor, but spoke confidently. While she reportedly had abnormal liver function at admission to the orphanage, she appears to no longer have any symptoms of liver problems. WACAP offers a $4000 grant to families who make less than $100,000/yr to help with adoption expenses.

Please contact Jo at WACAP as soon as possible if you have any questions. 206-575-4550

watch this!!

Hey, take a few minutes and watch this video, would ya?

Click HERE!

Oh and grab a tissue....and the checklist to start your homestudy.

Urgent News!!

I feel like I have a lot of things to chat with you about today but it may not all come to mind right at the moment! So please check back in later....

FIRST....If you haven't read Lynsay's blog, please do!! They have some exciting news and really need our help if at all possible. For those of you who don't know, Bill and Lynsay have started a ministry in Ch*na, taking in special needs orphans. It has been a hard mountain to climb as they have had a lot of obstacles but WOW! God has answered prayers and performed miracles right before their eyes. You simply must follow their journey! They are on the verge of getting 5 more children!!!! THEY NEED A VAN!!! There is just no way around that...you can't fit that many people in a taxi. Thankfully, they are only a few thousand short! PLEASE, please let me know if you can help financially.

Ok, another URGENT need to share. Our agency (WACAP) has a 13 year old girl (Ch*na) who is turning 14 NEXT MONTH and MUST be adopted. She is in their Promise Child program, which means that MOST of the adoption fees (including orphanage donation) will be waived. If you have your dossier in Ch*na right now and are interested, please let me know and I will help get you to the right person, or simply call WACAP. **Whatever fees you have already paid so far will be reimbursed or put towards your travel fees if you choose to adopt this girl!! Her only SN is that she had an elbow deformity but it has been surgically corrected.

As a follow-up to our saga, there's nothing new to report! As of right now, our agency has tried to call, fax, and email the Consulate...with no response. Nice. But since we are still within the time frame that it normally takes to get these documents back, we aren't taking any further measures yet. Thanks for the idea of a courier....we may do that if we don't hear something soon but our agency was uncertain that they would release any information to a courier who had not previously been involved in our case. (Kim H. please email me...I don't have your email address).

Ok, I gotta run for now! I hope to post good news later regarding any of the above! And perhaps some pics from our basketball awards ceremony last night!

And don't forget to read Lynsay's blog AND the Morning Star Project blog!!!

Is it God's Will??

Have you ever felt like you were caught in a decision-making dilemma, not knowing whether you should proceed with something because you weren't quite sure it was God's will or not?? You pray, stammer, seek counsel & sometime still feel uncertain? Oh my, I've been there so many times!! But I think sometimes we make things harder than they need to be.

And though we most certainly should be in deep prayer over decisions, I love what my friend Patty said during their last couple heartbreaking attempts at adoption. As they contemplated over whether it was God's will (to also adopt a 13 year old), they simply found themselves asking Does it honor God? I wonder if God sometimes just wants us to step out in faith, with all that we know is that yes, it does honor Him.

As we have been very excited about our next adoption, it was a very scary decision. We had to make a very quick decision to move forward on it...giving us little time for prayer, much less fasting. But while we were moving forward what I prayed was, "Lord, I'm a bit (ok, very) fearful of the unknown here. In many ways this just doesn't make sense that we are doing this. But what I know is that there are so many orphans in the world...how can we not do our part? We are moving forward in faith because we can't see how this would not be pleasing to You. IF for some reason this is not your will, then shut the door immediately." The door has remained wide open.

We were at one of our many basketball games the other night and a dad from the opposing team walked by & said how adorable Lucy is. Of course I said thank you & moved on. He later mentioned that if his wife saw her she would want to adopt. Hmmm. I know he meant well but it kind of hit me wrong. Just because you see a cute little girl you would want to adopt?? Anyway, later the wife did see her & said something about adopting but that he didn't want to...& that she couldn't talk him into it. Honestly, I felt my blood start to boil!! I was thinking...these aren't puppies we are talking about...they are PEOPLE...children who have NO HOMES!! I left it with this statement that I hope penetrated their hearts, "You know, there are 150 million orphans in the world....as Christians we MUST do our part." They looked puzzled & said, that's right.


I hear so many excuses why people can't adopt...we are too old, it's too expensive, I don't have the energy, it wouldn't be fair to our other children. UGH! Please!!!! I do realize that adoption isn't for everyone...but I'm really starting to think that it IS for MOST of us. PLEASE take the time to read Bill's adoption story. You will remember that he and his wife Lynsay are in Ch*na working in their ministry The Morning Star Project.

Bill's adoptive parents certainly stepped out in faith, and the result was God-honoring...and changed the lives of Bill & his siblings.

The only reason any of us should NOT adopt is that we have clearly heard God say NO. Has He really said NO to you?

Because She's Our Daughter

So sorry but this is rather long. Grab a big mug of coffee & a scone...

A couple of you mentioned in your comments that I had failed to tell you all about K-man's back injury. Ooops! Actually, I decided that since he doesn't like to air his ailments like I do, I better not tell it to the world. But thank you so much for your concern and please pray for him as he is continuing to heal.

On that ntoe, his pain meds seem to be putting him into a pretty deep sleep because he has been sawing enough logs to build a small cabin, leaving me wide-eyed in the middle of the wee hours. I finally told him this morning that he was officially on probation. He said, "Well what does that mean?" to which I replied, "We'll let that remain a mystery to keep you on your toes!" I'll let you know the outcome of that. Though I will note here that at this moment he is cleaning up the kitchen and insisted that I sit and enjoy my morning coffee! He's so great! (and I'm happy to say that threat or no threat, he would do that for me anyway...:)

I forgot to mention yesterday (and I CAN'T believe I didn't remember to put it on my list of thankful things...I may go back and add it) that it was one year ago that we first saw Lucy on the SN list with our agency and our hearts haven't regained their shape from the melted stage since. OH THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!!!!!! I weep every time I think about it. God has blessed us way beyond what we deserve. And now we are at it again!! WOO HOO!!!

It's interesting to me watching people react when I tell them we are adopting a 13 year old (and since it has been such a short time since getting Lucy, it often feels like I am telling people I'm pregnant just six months after giving birth! We're like rabbits.). In some cases, it's almost painful to see them keep their positive, excited face on. When we first started our adoption journey, thinking we were getting a baby, everyone would just squeal with delight (though they thought we were off our rockers starting over with a baby) at the thought of a little Chinese baby girl!! Then when we found Lucy on the Special Needs list and began telling people we weren't getting a baby after all but a 2 1/2 year old! Wow. You could almost see in their eyes "WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU ADOPT A TODDLER AT THE PEAK OF THE TERRIBLE TWO'S??" Ummm, because she's our daughter, duh!

So now the announcement of a 13 year old leaves everyone (ok, not EVERYONE...we do have many all-on-board supporters) a bit shocked. I just can see their brains buzzing, "Ok, you adopt a toddler and now you're getting a child just entering the teen stage?? Are you crazy??" Again, ummm yes, because she's our daughter...how can we NOT?? (Watch out, our next adoption might be a menopausal woman! Ha! Oh no, that would be me!)

I know that for many people adopting, they are doing so because of infertility and they desperately want a BABY. I TOTALLY get that!! But for us, we are adopting simply because we love children and we want to give a child a home...no matter their age.

I want you to read something that one of my blog friends posted to an adoption yahoo group:

I've actually talked recently to more then a few people in China about this. One girl I've talked with volunteers with an orphanage while her husband is there teaching English. She said that the kids who age out either end up in prostitution, or commit suicide(she said this was too common), the lucky ones end up working in a factory, or can get a job with the orphanage. I'm not sure when they are actually "released" onto the street..........I could try to find out. I can't imagine it being at 14 but I suppose its possible. She told me that ALL the kids want to be adopted, she said that even in the "worst case scenario" adoption where it was a way super hard transition that they would be so much better off being adopted because they would at least have opportunity and family to call their own. If they stay in China as an orphan the future is very hopeless...........................

Oh can't you see why adoption at this age is so crucial? I guess my point in all this is to perhaps reach even one family who is possibly struggling with the idea of an older child...maybe you kinda want to but can't let go of what that cute-baby scenario looks like in your head. Or all you can think about is the what-if's in a negative sense (power struggles, difficult attachment, rage...) and YES those may be things that you (and we) might deal with. But WHAT IF it turned into the biggest blessing you ever received....WHAT IF you realize how incomplete your family was without this child...WHAT IF we all just trust God to lead us and let go of those self-made family portraits in our brains and let Him show you what it should look like.

So for anyone who maybe cringes when we tell them we are adopting an older child, I can assure you we are every bit as excited (if not even a little more) as if we were getting a coo-cooing baby! Yippee JESUS!!

PRAYER REQUESTS: Our homestudy will be complete once we get our fingerprint stuff back from the FBI....PLEASE pray that this comes in SOON!!