Sunday, June 16, 2013

botox and farmers' market

Lori's list of random things from her weekend.

1.  Father's Day was rather uneventful.  Oh, we had the obligatory "lunch" and "presents",
but it never even occurred to me to take a picture, or anything related to that.
But trust me, K-Man was showered quite nicely with gifts, homemade cards and the like.
And to boot, he helped me clean out our horrendously disgusting hen house,
because last night's torrential storm left it beyond recognition.
I was fully prepared to just get the shot gun and take out the chickens, one by one,
and skip the whole cleaning process.
I was.
But...with the help of my MAN, we pressed on like any good prairie family would.
The chickens are safe, for now.

2.  Brenden is on the trendy Paleo diet and I am about to ring is neck because of it.
I really could almost cuss, I'm not even kidding.
Whoever thought of this non-grain diet clearly has not been in my house, nor has any idea
of what good and nutritious food really is.
And if you don't already know, Brenden is WAY skinny, like his mama used to be.
So, it's super annoying.
*&$^#^%#*@*, that's all I'm going to say about that, for now.

3.  This morning I had this poignant conversation with my husband, not even kidding:
Me:  "Honey, look at my face and tell me what you think I desperately need."
Him: "Ummm, you need to go to the bathroom??"
Me: "What? NO.  I need Botox, isn't that obvious?"
Him:  "I really don't know what to say right now."
Me:  "Yes, that's what I need.  Don't you see how angry I look all the time
with these blasted frown lines between my brows?"
Him:  "Aren't you always angry though?"

Oh, just forget it.  

4.  I'm contemplating participating in a local farmers' market.
But I am really not sure if it will be off-the-chain stressful, or over-the-top fun.
Or somewhere gracefully in between.
It's just a gamble, I guess.
Either way, I anticipate some really great blog material, so that's always a plus.
I'm an avid people-watcher, so I think I could gather some interesting
observations and report it all here for you all to enjoy.
And we could all have a laugh at the expense of others.
(Well that's not very nice.)

5.  It's 7:43 PM as I type this, and I couldn't be more ready for bed.
Honestly, I am becoming more and more old-lady-like every day.
And I kid you not when I say that I am on the hunt for some really comfy
zip-up cotton house coats.  Really.
We'll talk more about that later.  
I have some serious sensory issues I haven't discussed with you yet.

6.  I sometimes wonder why I continue to type my blog posts centered,
instead of the traditional left-to-right way.
I wonder what that says about my personality.
Full of anxiety and mother issues?
(Just kidding, Mom!)

7.  Speaking of the torrential storm we had last night,
here is a picture of what it did to my Mother's Day tree.
Well, the tree I got for Mother's Day some 17 years ago.

 I nearly cried.

8.  Here is a picture of Isaiah from yesterday when I caught him in the 
laundry room.  With his underwear on his head.  Yes.

 And I'll leave you with that.

I'll be sure to keep you updated on the farmers' market and Botox situations.


Chris said...

See if I can remember all the comments I made while I read your post...K-man, you almost made it through that minefield ...except for the last part gonna have to learn how to grocery shop and cook AND clean up after your self...if you gonna persist in some crazy diet
Wah about the tree, but the young'uns can buy you a new one...with twice the # of kids they can pool their resources and buy a big tree
As to Isaiah...his hands were full and he needed to keep the clean separate from the dirty...umm, maybe not.

Wendy said...

Lori, you really keep me laughing. You are too funny! As for the hen house...really glad you got it clean...poor chickens. I just got the book about the Paleo diet and when I just read your post I thought, there is no way in your family that anyone could survive on that diet...your treats are so yummy, you could resist...tell him they had to diet like that because your mom was not around but had she been, things would have definitely been different. Chris is right about the you can go bigger...that was why you had all your children wasn't get bigger presents. As for botox....I would not even go there with hubby...believe me, I have tried and they just do not get it. I managed to get rid of mine with the use of L'Bri. Look it up, it is all natural. And Lori, PLEASE sell at the farmer's market...can't wait to read those posts...better put on a depend first so please warn me ahead of time. Ok, enough to bed.

Wendy said...

Actually, I meant to say who could resist...darn spell check...this computer should have know what I was trying to say....And, now I need to prove once again that I am not a robot.

Tesseraemum said...

1st of all, you can fix the frown lines AFTER the kids are grown. I've found that the perpetual scowl helps to drive home the beware of mama vibe I'm going for!!
2nd, you really need to put your foot down with the paleo diet thing. I get that the boy is grown and in college but while he is in your house you have an obligation to keep him from looking like dinosaur skeleton :)
3rd, the farmers market idea could be really great. I will warn you that you could have people like my friend who just this weekend called the woman who makes pretzel bread to make sure she was going to be there saturday because she really had a hankering. Not too much pressure there.
4th, the girl that I job coach asked me last night what I was planning to do when I got home. Ummm, go to bed... Yes, at 8pm. No, this did not add credence to my claims that, yes I'm old enough to be your mother but I'm not old!!!
5th, I can see why Isaiah wants to show off his undies. They are super cool. Way more fun than tighty whities! Just add smelling his head to your leaving the house routine!! Sheri

Holly said...

LOLOL!! Love the botox one the best. :)

Jennifer Hnilo said...

Your posts make me smile!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...