Monday, September 3, 2012

got fermentation?

 Do you ever feel overwhelmed by dysfunction?
Do you ever want to run away screaming?
Ever want to curl up in a ball and just stay there 
until Jesus returns?

I have no idea what you're talking about.

So, instead of smoking cigarettes or doing meth,
or any of the above
I....bake bread.

And most recently,
I started a sourdough starter.

I'm in way over my head, man.

Talk about needy.

And on an easier note,
yet still dealing with fermentation,
I'm also baking regular bread like a crazy woman.
Here's some dough,
hanging out for 12+ hours to ferment. 

Oh man,
so sorry there's no after-pics.
But trust me, the above concoction turned
into some totally radical bread.
Four loaves, in fact.

And while we're talking addictions,
let me ask you,
do you have a Food Network habit?

Oh golly.

Let me give you my current list of lusts:
(Oh gee, someone is going to google lu*sts and end up here.)
(You need Jesus, you do.  Praying for you, man.)

My most favorite and most desired show on
the FN is,

Triple D.

It's terrible.

And wonderful.

So very, very wonderful.

Guy has me convinced that I could run my own
Completely talked into the fact that I could
get up early each morning
and bake goods for strangers who will
in turn speak so highly of me on national TV,
that I will blush.
And smile my way to the bank.

So, be looking for me at your local eatery.
I might be running the place by the
time you get through reading this.

I'm a mess.

But, you knew that from the get-go, right?

And I'm very, very hungry.


Serving the King said...

I feel like a less than stellar house wife as I buy my kids pop tarts and feed them mac and cheese Miss Bake your Own Bread and Ferment Stuff. I think I need to step up my game a notch or 12. Gotta keep up with Jones....errr the Lori. :) You go girl!

Annie said...

Dysfunction? I have no idea what you are talking about.
ummm...errr... hand me the flour!

Tesseraemum said...

Oh my word! Guy is Mark's fav! In fact my Mark is alot like Guy! They cook the same way. Off the cuff. Makin it look so easy! We could totally go into business. You and Mark could cook and I can keep the place running. No cookin for me! I'm not allowed!
I have a Guy story...My friend's son came home one afternoon and said that his friend in the neighborhood invited him to stay for dinner. The mom's cousin was coming into town. Which she thought was a little odd (why do you invite the neighbor kid over for dinner with your cousin?)Well, he came home and said that the neighbor's cousin COOKED dinner and that he is the guy from Triple D!!!! Fun Fun!! Sheri

Chris said...

I need some freezer meals, and don't have time to research. could you do that for me? JK, I have so much to do and I just keep clicking refresh on the computer. I will regret this.

Jean said...

You open a diner and I will be there!!

You know I have had days where I have thought... If I smoked, Id have a cigarette right now! BUT, I don't smoke- whew! Thank goodness!

You Go girl!!

quilt'n-mama said...

We love sourdough! A few years ago when we did the insane cinnamon roll fundraiser for my hubby when her ran a marathon for LWB, I had so much sourdough starter in my fridge I had to get rid of "normal things"to make space according to my kiddos!

as for crazy... that would be our life this week!

lotty said...

Cool. You made fermentation process more interesting. I enjoyed the read.

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