adoption excuses dissected...then put aside

As promised,
here is my big blog post that I said was coming.

My heart is still so full from that life-changing
day at the orphanage and from holding
the sweet babies at The Morning Star Family Home.
I hope I can convey what God has put on my heart.
Please don't turn away if you think....
or you know, that adoption isn't something God has
called you to do.
Perhaps you are right.
Hopefully though, you will be more inspired to do what God
has called you to do, whatever that may be.

I had told you to set aside all your excuses not to adopt.
Well, let's not do that quite yet...
let's take a moment to dissect some of those excuses, ok?

You may say:

*Good for you for adopting, but it's not for me.
Are you sure?
Have you REALLY prayed with an open heart...
and listened for God's response?
Please spend some un-rushed, dedicated time communing
with the Lord on this, would you?
Don't be afraid of His answer.

*I would love to adopt, but I can't afford it.
*I don't have the patience.
*I don't think I could love an adopted child like I do my bio kids.
*I don't have time for another child...I'm so busy!
Ok, I clump all of those together because I have one great
answer for all of them:

God's provision.

Let me ask you,

why are we here?

I mean, are we here on earth simply to exist...or survive?
If so,
then God's promise to meet all of our needs would
end at food, water, and shelter...right?
After all, that's all we really need to simply survive.

But...
we aren't here merely to survive.
We are here to fulfill God's purpose in each of
our lives.

So if God has a purpose and a plan for us....
wouldn't fulfilling that purpose
have needs in order for it all to happen?

So, let's think outside the box here and realize that
God meeting our needs INCLUDES giving us
ALL that is required to fulfill His plan for us.
~Money to adopt...
~Patience
~Plenty of love
~Prioritized lifestyle
~And much, much more

Or maybe your excuse is..

*I'm too old to adopt.
Well, maybe so.
Why not find a young family who needs
help with financing their adoption?
But,
I do know of two couples who are in
their early 60s who are getting
ready to travel to adopt.

*I don't want to start all over with a baby.
Ok, how about an older child?


*I don't want the baggage that comes with an older child.
OK, then how about a baby with "special needs"?

The other excuse you may have (and I don't
say this with any condemnation because it was
very real in my own situation),

*But I'm stricken with fear.

Listen, I'm so with you on this.
But yet, I'm not.

You see,
if we look at it from a Biblical perspective,
we understand that
GOD IS LOVE.
And perfect love casts out ALL FEAR.
And if we are disciplined believers,
we know to take every thought captive and make
it obedient to Christ...
Who, is love...who, casts out ALL FEAR.
Make sense?

I remember when we first started the process
to adopt Lucy.
At that time, I was NOT steeped in the adoption
community like I am now. I had NO connections
to other families...no clue of all the blogs I
could read for inspiration.
It was basically just K-man, me, and the Lord.
I would OFTEN have thoughts of
things that put fear into my heart that would
leave me full of doubt.
Finally,
while driving down the road one day,
the Lord told me clearly that he would NOT guide me by fear.
So if fear wasn't coming from Him to show me
that we shouldn't adopt...
then it was most certainly coming from the enemy.
Well now,
that turned things around for me in an instant.
So,
taking those thoughts captive became
a daily (even hourly) practice.
And let me tell you,
it made a HUGE difference.
When I would turn those thoughts over to the Lord,
I would receive warm encouragement and
very real confirmation.
Over and over and over and over and over.

The Lord NEVER ceased to meet my every need
along the way.

Having said all that, I do realize that it's not easy.
We are only a couple weeks into our second adoption,
so I don't say any of this as if our story has
a neat and tidy ending.

In fact, while in Ch*na,
I received an email about a dear friend whose family
had decided to disrupt their older child adoption,
after one year with her.
They are a good Christian family.
They tried hard...really hard.
Sadly, it just didn't work.
Perhaps God used them as a vessel to get this
sweet girl to her true forever family.

My point?
Adoption isn't always pretty.
In fact, at some point(s), it WILL be downright hard,
stressful, messy and mind-boggling.

But by God's grace, we need to press on.

But trust me,
there are so many moments of JOY!

If He has called you,
He will lead you and give you ALL
that is required to make it happen.

So now,
putting all the excuses
behind us, I ask you again:

Has God called you to adopt?



The now empty bed (in a full orphanage)
of a former orphan
(our Shu Li)...