Thursday, August 25, 2011

a gallon of homemade vanilla {but first, the vodka}

Last night after I dropped the kids off at church,
I was on a mission to get my vodka
for my vanilla extract that I'm going to make.

It was something I had to work my nerve up to do
because you see, unlike many of you, we don't have liquor in our
grocery stores in these parts.
So there was no masking my shame with Pop-tarts and Doritos.

Hard core.

I had to march into a liquor store and buy my gallon of mood/baking
altering beverage.

I will be using for the latter.
(So far as you are concerned)

I had my speech for the clerk all worked out in my head.

"As you can see, sir, I am purchasing an unusually large amount
of vodka...but please don't worry,
I am simply making vanilla extract."

To which he would say,
"Oh okay, ma'am...that explains the vodka.
But what's
your plan for
all this Taquilla?"


Bahaha!

Just kidding, just kidding.

But reality was,
I got to the counter and it was apparent to me that the
tattoo-ridden lad didn't seem the least bit
surprised by my purchase.
I am guessing that such a transaction by a 42-year mother of six
is quite normal.

So I paid and got the heck out of there.

And I'm so thankful to tell you that I got in and out without
anyone from church seeing me.
As far as I know.

So now I'm ready to make my vanilla.
Although I did wake up this morning with the nagging question
of why the heck I need a gallon of
vanilla.

But I'm in too deep to turn back now.

Family and friends, please do act surprised when you get your
own bottle of baking enhancement/coffee additive for Christmas, okay?
(what you do with your vanilla is your business).


That's my vodka-buying story.



I will keep you updated on my vanilla-making.

Because I know you are on the edge of your seat.

9 comments:

Karin said...

Good thing no one at church saw you. Wouldn't want anyone to know. It's not like you blogged it to the entire known world, or anything. :P

I think you should put your vanilla in cute little bottles, find some vintage looking labels online, print them and put on your cute bottles and sell them! Viola! Sell the to the egg guy. :)

Cate said...

My husband is an artisan beer maker. He loves it, and he loves good beer. Me. I hate the stuff. A few months ago, he'd had a really bad day at work, and we decided to order a pizza for dinner. I decided to be a good wife and, when I went to pick up the pizza, I ran by the grocery store and grabbed a six pack of some of his favorite snooty beer. I got all kinds of looks at the checkout. Unfortunately, it didn't dawn on me until I was driving home that I was EIGHT MONTHS PREGNANT and buying beer. Glad you got your vodka without incident. I have yet to take my daughter to that grocery store.

Unknown said...

You've got my address. I use a lot of vanilla. That's all I'm sayin.

Angie said...

Well, if you would have seen someone from church as you exited the liquor store, I bet they would have had some vanilla-making liquor, too. :) And if you have any leftover vanilla that you don't know what to do with...just sayin'! :)

Holly said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Oh my, that was funny. : )

Unknown said...

If its not a secret, I would love to have the recipie. : )

Erin said...

love it! I always want to try to make my own vannila but Im too affraid to be seen entering the liquor store. I just know my pastor would be driving by as Im walking out:)

Hunan Mommy said...

This story totally cracks me up.

Molly said...

I love it! I just came across your blog and was so excited to see the Kansas shirt on your son! Rock Chalk! My sister did homemade vanilla for Christmas a few years ago. I add some vodka whenever I take some out and it is still awesome!

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