Wednesday, May 4, 2011

orphanage visit {a sobering thing}

It's official.
Isaiah Jack Dong Ji
Elijah Andrew Hao Hao
are our sons.

We now have six (gulp) kiddos.
Let the crazy begin.

Just after all the papers were signed for Hao Hao,
they headed to the orphanage
for the sad good-bye.

We had a care package put together for Xiao Dong (HH's brother)
but HH wanted to add a few things.
So they
went to Wal Mart and Hao Hao picked out some
snacks...and shampoo & body wash.

I need to say that this sibling relationship did NOT catch
us off guard.
We have known about it from the very start.
As you may recall, I posted about it a while back.
We did all we could to try to adopt him also.
It went nowhere.
And we were totally at peace that we were at the end of
making it happen.
Though this saddens us deeply, it is just the way it is.
We live in a fallen, broken world and things simply are not always fair.
It's not fair that these boys were left as orphans in the first place.
It's not fair that they have to be separated.
It's just not fair.

They will remain in constant contact via the internet.

Meet Xiao Dong.

Hao Hao and Xiao Dong...brothers forever, even if they
are an ocean apart.

Hao Hao has no doubt looked forward to being on this is side
of the gift-giving for a very long time.
In fact,
Much to Kelly's surprise,
he had taken most of the gifts we had given him on Gotcha Day,
and passed them to his friends at the orphanage.
My heart.
He's a sweet, sweet boy.

There are so many beautiful faces there.

Kelly said there is no way I could have handled the emotions of the day.
It was too sad to see these tearful brothers part ways.
He said he felt like the bad guy.
Darned if you do, darned if you don't.
It was hard.

But Kel assured Xiao Dong that we will take good care
of his brother...that he can call or skype anytime.
We have given him the phone number of some dear friends in
Beijing who will help him if needed.

It's a sobering thing.
But I am thankful that Hao Hao's future is bright.
And I totally trust God's sovereignty.
He has a plan for Xiao Dong.
And though we all think America is the answer for these kids,'s not.

God is alive and on the move in China and I know that
there is great hope that Xiao Dong will come
to know Him as Savior.

Great hope.


Janet and Kevin said...

After reading this post with tears streaming down my face, there just aren't any words to say today. God is in charge - that we know.

So glad that Hao Hao's future is bright and so is your Little Mr. Toot's. Will pray for Hao Hao's brother for God to give him a hope and a future, too.

In Christ,
janet and gang

Kristy said...

I am so heartbroken:( Crying mess... and yes i am at work! God is at work in China and I trust in His plan. Praying for all.

Doug said...

I can't BEGIN to imagine how those two brothers felt as they parted. But it's wonderful that they'll be able to stay in touch. Technology is a beautiful thing.

Kelly Marriott said...

This was such a sobering post. I can't even begin to imagine how the brothers are feeling right now, but He DOES have a plan and I'm sure the brothers will see each other again. God bless all of you.


Anonymous said...

What a bittersweet time. So glad that the 2 boys will be able to stay connected.

Love how possessive HH seems with Isaiah. Seems like they're boding quickly.

Adrian Roberta said...

This is so hard to read, and to know it is happening right now, on the other side of the ocean. With God, all things are possible, I have to hold firm to His perfect Soverenty in this. I'm sure I read your earlies posts before, but I must have forgotten since....but I will commit to praying for your boys and thier adjustment to living lives least for this next season of thier lives....

Jen said...

I wish I could see well enough through these tears to type. But I can't . My heart is breaking for both of the brothers and for you guys. However, I do know that God Almighty has BIG and wonderful things in store for them!!

Many prayers being lifted high!

Nancy said...

I, too, am heartbroken. Sometimes life just seems so unfair. I know you did everything you could to bring both boys home. It just wasn't a part of God's plan. Will continue to pray. Thank the Lord for the internet and skype!!!!

Andrea said...

thanks for sharing this. i know it was a hard day for everyone,but you have given your sons a gift.
they will cherish these stories and pictures for the rest of their lives.

Karin said...

Oh Lori...I have a big lump in my throat. Is Xiao Dong over 14? You are so right...God has a plan and part of it is for XD to stay in China for now. I can't even imagine how hard it is for him right now and how hard for HaoHao to enjoy his new family while maybe feeling guilty that XD is not. Lots of prayers going up for all of you/them.

Anonymous said...

XD looks so happy for HH and HH looks so torn. What a HARD day for them! XD is a very handsome young man. God has a plan and I know he loves these 2 young men and has the best plan for them. Praying XD has every opportunity to have a personal relationship with the Father. Praying for HH and Kman in the aftermath of the traumatic day.

Our Family said...

Oh, Lori!! What a beautiful post. He IS sovereign and has all the right answers, even when we don't like them or understand them. I love to sense the peace with which you wrote this!! Heartbreak AND peace - amazing how they can go hand in hand. I will be adding Xiao Dang to my prayer list for sure.

Anonymous said...

Ain't God good! Xiao Dang has ATLEAST 12 people praying for him already!:) Tell his precious little brother he is going to be ok because people are praying.

Stacy said...

Hard to read through the tears.
This is my favorite post of yours.
How hard for everyone.

I have been praying for them!!

Jennifer said...

Oh gracious. No words. I will keep Xiao Dang in my prayers. What a very emotional day. Hugs!

Chris said...

Wow! what a tough day! I guess the only benefit I can see is all they prayers that young man now has...
I need one of those buttons that they sold at Sta*les that say "That was easy" and reprogram it to say..."Life isn't Fair"

Good thing we have God in control...

Madeleine said...

SO, when i first saw the picture of your hubby & your 2 boys, I started crying from the deep felt joy.

Then I read the rest of the story and the tears continued for totally different reasons. You know our story. :::sigh:: Same story, different story. Heart break regardless.

I am so.very.thankful. for your family for your & your husband's heart and obedience, and for your words. Sharing with us your joys, your victories and your tears.

And he is right, you would have been a holy mess for a long time had you been there.

Adeye said...

Oh goodness. There are no words :( What a HANDSOME boy he is. I just know that I know that the Father has a frim grip on him and that His plans for him are matter which way things turn out. What a blessing that he will be in constant contact with his little brother...that is such a blessing.

Aching with you, friend.


Sally-Girl! said...

Thankful and at the same time so sad for the boys and at the same time so hopeful for both of them!!

K-man is a rock star for today!!!

David and Janet Hurley said...

How bittersweet for Hao Hao! How old is the brother?? How old does he have to be in order to leave China on his own, if he chose too?
It is truly a miracle that all the "powers that be" and the technology will allow the brother's to stay in touch.

Jean said...

Wow.. that was a tough day. Yep, it's good you are home and Kman handled it.

All those boys are so cute together especially the guy in the plaid shirt ;-)

You know ya just never know where God will guide you or Elijah or his older brother. It is not god bye forever- just for awhile.

Put your trust in HIM. Someday the boys will meet again.

Nicole A. said...

Congrats on your boys officially being your boys now! That is exciting!

It's so very bittersweet to see HH and his older bio brother. But, you're right - they will keep in touch and you will get to see God's plan for their futures unfold.

Praying for you all!

All the best,
Nicole A., now in LA

Robin said...

How utterly heartbreaking. What a blessing technology is though. Living 6,000 miles from all our family myself, I often rejoice that telephones, skype and e-mail can keep those relationships strong, and think in horror of all that people had to give up in the days when even a letter could take six months, if it ever arrived at all.

Whatever the plan is for HH and his brother, what a blessing for them both to be able to share it across the miles.

Tony and Rett said...

Oh, Lori.

I'm so sorry. My mama's heart is breaking for you. You tried. God is sovereign though.

What a sweet boy you have. So giving.

connie said...

So glad the Father is in control and we are not! And I'm so grateful the boys will be able to communicate. Who knows what huge plans the Lord has for them...and your entire family?!?

Debby said...

Lori...Yep, bittersweet & not fair, but you can only do what you can...

Thankfully, technology is available today for them to stay in touch. I know that you will support him in whatever ways you can.

I am thankful that although sad about it, you are in a peaceful place. Can not wait for those boys to now get home!!!!

Happy EARLY Mother's Day (or maybe, like in our case, every day is Mother's Day)....

Annie said...

Lori, I have to say, I read so many sad stories that I don't often fall to tears lately. But this story has my heart broken. Maybe the older brother might be able to come and visit or get a student opportunity and stay with you all. Oh my heart!
Hoo Hoo is beautiful inside and out. What a blessing he is!

Kim said...

These pictures of Xiaodong and Haohao are so touching, I'm fighting back the tears. We do not always understand why. Just like I don't understand why Zijie is not heart breaks but I trust God has a plan for him, Xiaodong and the others left behind. God's plans are so much greater than ours. I am praying that our boys will come to know the Lord....I'm praying that God will prepare Xiaodong and Zijie's heart and that someday they will answer His call and they will come to know Jesus. Thank you for being obedient to God's call to adopt HaoHao. I love you and am so thankful that I can call you my friend.


Anita said...

Lori - I have so much catching up to do and probably never completely, but just reading this tonight (finally) leaves my heart aching and broken for Hao Hao's brother, too. I'm sure in many ways he also feels like a son to you and Kel. But you are right...the Lord is on the move everywhere and can and will use your friends and others to minister to him. Praying for the Lord's intervention in his life. HUGS!

Wife of the Pres. said...

Amen! America is not always the answer. YES, God has a plan for Xiao Dong. What a precious reminder Lori that we are not all the world ... America that is.

Savoring every word of your blog and I agree your K is SUPER K! Wow! I'm so impressed!!! I nearly came unglued on our trip and my DH was solid as a rock just like yours. We are blessed!!!

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