Thursday, May 21, 2009

Mindless TV and Lucy, boogers and all.

Last week I received a phone call from someone who quickly assured me they weren't
selling anything (red flag) then proceeded to talk to me about doing a television

Normally, a telephone survey that takes more than a few minutes, I refuse to
participate in. Come on...I'm busy, people.

But I'm so spit-firing mad these days about the garbage on TV that I saw this as
my golden opportunity to change the boob-tube as we know it.

Always an optimist.

First she asked if I was between 18-34. I chuckled.


Thinking the conversation would end there, the semi-nice
lady surprised me with,

"Well, we target a wide range of ages."


Then she said,
"Are you between 35-70?"

What the heck??

I laughed and said, "Wow, that's a wide range!" giggle, giggle.

She didn't think it was funny.

I said, "Yes." Which I was sure left her thinking
I was teetering on the high end of that totter.

"How many hours of comedy TV do you watch each week?"

"Do you mean first-run shows or re-runs of golden oldies?"

"Just answer give me a number ma'am."

Fine. "None."

"How many hours of dramas do you watch each week?"

Knowing now that this was cut and dry,

I said, "None."

All true. I have yet to find a new-run series that is worthy of me sitting
for 30-60 minutes doing nothing but filling my transformed mind
with junk.

Next she asked me if I would be willing to watch a new 30-minute comedy on a DVD
that they would send.

Sure, why not.

So yesterday I sat and watched this stupid show. There were detailed instructions
on how to watch it.

Absolutely do not take notes
Don't you worry.

Only watch it once.
Again, no worries.

Watch it in one sitting.
That one was tough. Hello, I have a 3 year old!

Well, the show was stupid and I felt like I was being tortured.
Who needs w*terboarding? Shows like this will bring out the most deeply
hidden secrets from any slug.
(But I'm sure our current administration would think that was too
harsh on those nice bad guys. I digress.)

Long story short, the show also had commercials, which I assumed I was supposed
to watch but I zoned out.

When the gal called last night to get my reaction to the DVD, she asked me
about three questions about the show itself.....

then for the next 35 minutes she asked me about the stinkin' commercials
that I couldn't remember anyway!!!!

I finally told her,

"You will get two more minutes of my time, then I MUST go."

"OK, we are almost done, I promise."

Two minutes later,

"Look, I'm done. I have a family to tend to."

"Oh but we are in the last stretch."


I was completely out of my mind at that point.

And dog-gone-it, I'm sure my abrupt departure disqualified me for the
$100 prize drawing.

Oh well.

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever again. Ever.

Live and learn.

Now, here's a good healthy dose of Lucy and her new faces
that she likes to make us laugh with......

(Sorry about the plethora of boogers...she has a cold)


Shonni said...

This was so fun to read...and I'm glad it wasn't me (LOL).

Chris said...

I tried to comment last nite, but my goofy computer didn't let me...I love those survey calls. I say "sorry we don't own a TV" there is usually dead silence on the other end, then they say "sorry" and hang up.

Hezra said...

ahh, another beautiful face with a snotty nose. My moriah has the same look this week. lol, and has done her own hair with her sisters de frizzing hair lotion(Moriah has straight smooth hair) So she now looks greasy, and snotty. lol And yet, I STILL see the beautiful face.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...