As a continuation from my post the other day,
I would like to write this letter to my family:
Dearest Family,
It has come to my attention that my perimenopausal moods
seem to be effecting morale around here.
For that,
I am very sorry.
Actually, no I'm not.
Not at all.
Deal with it.
However,
in order to give you a heads-up regarding what my
Mood-Of-The-Day may be,
I've devised this little system that will be sure to give you fair warning:
When Mommy makes you breakfast,
and it goes like this:
Cereal boxes slammed down on counter,
followed by the milk jug,
followed by bowl/spoons that give a chilling rattle,
that's your que that Mommy isn't feeling so well.
Don't ask for a single thing.
Don't even look at me.
Eat quietly, as you know how the sound of chewing
is like bamboo shoots under my fingernails,
put your dishes in the dishwasher and walk away
as quietly as you can.
Now, if Mommy actually asks you which cereal you want,
and pours it for you...that's your que that Mommy
is in a semi-human mood.
You can relax just a bit and maybe we can enjoy a
little conversation.
Maybe.
BUT,
on mornings when you smell French Toast being made,
with Mommy's homemade bread,
and you actually get it served
to you with powdered sugar and a cold glass of milk,
why,
that's your que that Mommy is in a mountain-top mood.
Ask me for anything.
A car.
A new wardrobe.
An all-inclusive vacation to the Caribbean.
So there you have it.
Simple, right?
And aren't you glad that today was a French Toast day?
Me too.
Now go pack your bags...we have a tropical vacation to go on.
*I wish*
Love you all...with all my heart.
Even on slammed-on-the-counter-cereal days.
Really.
I would like to write this letter to my family:
Dearest Family,
It has come to my attention that my perimenopausal moods
seem to be effecting morale around here.
For that,
I am very sorry.
Actually, no I'm not.
Not at all.
Deal with it.
However,
in order to give you a heads-up regarding what my
Mood-Of-The-Day may be,
I've devised this little system that will be sure to give you fair warning:
When Mommy makes you breakfast,
and it goes like this:
Cereal boxes slammed down on counter,
followed by the milk jug,
followed by bowl/spoons that give a chilling rattle,
that's your que that Mommy isn't feeling so well.
Don't ask for a single thing.
Don't even look at me.
Eat quietly, as you know how the sound of chewing
is like bamboo shoots under my fingernails,
put your dishes in the dishwasher and walk away
as quietly as you can.
Now, if Mommy actually asks you which cereal you want,
and pours it for you...that's your que that Mommy
is in a semi-human mood.
You can relax just a bit and maybe we can enjoy a
little conversation.
Maybe.
BUT,
on mornings when you smell French Toast being made,
with Mommy's homemade bread,
and you actually get it served
to you with powdered sugar and a cold glass of milk,
why,
that's your que that Mommy is in a mountain-top mood.
Ask me for anything.
A car.
A new wardrobe.
An all-inclusive vacation to the Caribbean.
So there you have it.
Simple, right?
And aren't you glad that today was a French Toast day?
Me too.
Now go pack your bags...we have a tropical vacation to go on.
*I wish*
Love you all...with all my heart.
Even on slammed-on-the-counter-cereal days.
Really.
12 comments:
Bahahahaha.... I heard Gary Smalley tell a story once about a wife whose husband was complaining about not getting a hot meal for breakfast. His wife glared at him and said, 'Dear...if you want a hot breakfast, light your cornflakes on fire." I thought it was hilarious...my husband did not. :)
OH how I dig you soooo much. I had my 13 yo ...oops ''lmost 14 mom''... daughter read your post...because, let's just say they so get the message, I have mornings like that ....being 46 yo my girls get the message. My 7 yo cutie pie will sometimes come for a hug...and say is it a good morning mommy? She melts my heart... I'm always cool for a soft loving hug from these tiny little arms, and her smile... missing all these teeth...can't go wrong. But boy do I get you, they sure do not have Frech Toasts on those mornings.
Marie-Claude
Hahahahaha! You never cease to make me laugh!! If I lived closer, i'd come over to handle breakfast for your precious children on those slam-on-the-counter days. Or maybe you could move here??????!!!!!! (HINT HINT HINT HINT HINT.......smile!!) Get it?
Love you chica!
BLACK COHASH! I swear by it! You can buy it in your grocery store in the vitamin section. It was my saving grace, well actually Jesus is my Saving Grace, but I'm pretty certain He put that black cohash in my life! Seriously, it helped me with those mood swings and with hot flashes. And, it's safe. Let me know if you try it or just post whether it was a Cereal morning or a French Toast morning. Bless your heart! And, all of the hearts that are living with you during this unpleasant time. I'll Pray, too. Hugs ~ Jo
hahahahah...i'm sorry but.....hahahaha!
{I feel your pain, girl!}
hahaha!! That's one of the best ones ever!!! : )
I need to make this a poster in the kitchen. I am so tired of being called moody. DARNIT! Don't these people realize that fetching and fixing food for ten is a BIG DEAL!??
I love it!! I hope they all read it!!
Some mornings I hear the whisper "Mommy's crabby, mommy's crabby"- that makes me even crabbier!
The chewing- oh ya- ugh- That's when I make a general announcement to the breakfast crew-
'Chew with you mouth shut, chew quietly" and then I give the look to the perpetrators!
Of course- then someone asks me a question just as I take a bite and I end up talking with food tucked in the side of my mouth... not a good example.
Do what I say not what I do!!
Hoping you have all french toast days!
(It does get better- the hormones simmer down)
So can relate to this post! Thanks fot the chuckle.
janet and gang
Hahahahaha! Print that off and laminate it girl! :) Hand it to them as bookmarks. ;) Just kidding...but really... ;) Hope your day is going GREAT! :)
Lets just say....I needed that. I needed to find some humor in my cereal-slammed-on-the-counter days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) Bless you!!!
LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!!! You are the best! Can I steal this from you?!
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